Kibud Av - Overlapping Obligations
QUESTION: If both your father and grandfather ask you for a drink of water, who should you serve first?
ANSWER: As noted in a previous Halacha Yomis, even if there is an obligation to service a grandparent, it is certainly less than the obligation toward a parent. If so, it would seem obvious that one should honor one’s father by getting his drink of water first. However, R. Moshe Chagiz (Teshuvos Shtei Halechem, siman 43) writes that one should honor their grandfather first. His rationale is that both you and your father are obligated to honor your grandfather. Since your father is also obligated to provide water for his father, he cannot ask you to bring his own drink first. Similarly, according to this view, if you bring a portion of food to the table and your father and grandfather are both waiting to be served, you should serve your grandfather first. R. Yaakov Emden, on the other hand, (Shailas Yaavetz, siman 129) strongly disagrees. He writes that unquestionably you must honor your father first, since your obligation to your father is primary.
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