Kibud Av - Forgiveness

QUESTION: I did not show proper honor to my parents. Must I ask them forgiveness?

ANSWER: One who transgresses a mitzvah bein adam l’chaveiro (between man and his fellow man) must ask forgiveness both from Hashem, for not heeding His commandment, and from the friend that was wronged. For a mitzvah bein adam la’Makom (between man and Hashem), one need only ask forgiveness from Hashem. The Minchas Chinuch (mitzvah 33) is uncertain if honoring a parent is considered a mitzvah bein adam l’chaveiro—perhaps the extra honor that is due to a parent is a mitzvah bein adam la’Makom. On the other hand, maybe the mitzvah creates a unique obligation to the parent, and failure to honor the parent is a bein adam l’chaveiro failure. In mitzvah 33, the Minchas Chinuch leaves the question unanswered but in mitzvah 364, the Minchas Chinuch writes that honoring parents falls under the category of mitzvos bein adam l’chaveiro. In practice, if one did not show proper respect, one must ask forgiveness from their parents (Yalkut Yosef, Kibud Av V’aim, 1:12).

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The Gerald & Karin Feldhamer OU Kosher Halacha Yomis is dedicated to the memory of Rav Yisroel Belsky, zt"l, who served as halachic consultant for OU Kosher for more than 28 years; many of the responses in Halacha Yomis are based on the rulings of Rabbi Belsky. Subscribe to the Halacha Yomis daily email here.